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[work, transition, going full time]

March 25, 2013

I certainly haven’t kept up with updating my blog, and it’s for good reason: I’m now able to be me 24/7. Do I feel relieved? Certainly! Do I feel anxious? Yep! Overall, though, I’m happy with the decision to transition when I did.

Work has been… work has actually been pretty okay. Roughly 4 weeks ago, I stood in front of my team of co-workers and told them that I’m trans. I don’t quite know what I expected (management had made it clear they had my back, so I knew nothing terrible could happen), but really, nothing happened. As the meeting ended, I figured that a co-worker or two would say something positive to me about the meeting, but instead, everyone just filed out, went back to their desks and continued working as if it was just any old meeting.

I’m okay with that.

During my first week of presenting female at work, I went through an emotional roller coaster. Getting my name changed on my email address was more of a challenge than had been anticipating, leading to some embarrassment, as I asked people to call me Parker in spite of my email still using my birth name.

Eventually, though, the name situation worked itself out. The only issue that frustrated me about the process was when an employee in human resources ignored my desire for certain things to remain confidential (which, at the time, they agreed to). This employee went on to inform someone in senior management of everything I said, which I feel was taken out of context and interpreted in a way that makes me look bad, professionally.

Other than that particular situation, work has been fine. I have been coming in earlier than usual, staying later. I’m determined to not let my trans status prevent me from climbing the corporate ladder. Months ago, I was told that I was one of the next in line for potential promotion, and I am going to hold my employers to that. I know I can do my job just as good, if not better, than many of my co-workers.

Deep down, though, I am afraid that my trans status may lead to me being overlooked for positions that would have been available to me as a cis male. This isn’t based on anything specific, but it is a fear I have.

Here’s hoping those fears are unfounded.

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